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I think there’s mundane reasoning for everything. There has to be a sane scientific explanation for it all, right? Although what I’m writing has nothing to do with the science vs. religion argument; it’s about what I can only refer to as “blissful ignorance”. I have no real convictions, and anything I claim to stand by has a nihilistic overcoat and paints this world as a meaningless bore. Despite my unwavering opinion regarding the impossible existence of a “reason for it all”, I find myself lusting for the ability to believe there is. Some cultish absurd thought would probably give me more joy and motivation to continue in life than I am currently capable of -even if I knew deep down that it was a lie. I don’t think there’s an afterlife. No Heaven, no Hell… or maybe I just hope there’s not, because if any Christian was right about these places and the presence of God, well then I know exactly where I’d go. Though I find it difficult to believe that anything succeeding this is worse than the life I’ve lived. I understand why people turn to the idea of a higher power, or predetermined set of beliefs…why they succumb to dogma… It makes the uncertainty of everything much easier to bear. I wish I had the ability to confide in something like that, to be able to find comfort in my life.
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