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I want to return to that feeling, that moment. It was a time where it didn’t matter if I
lived or died. I could do what I wanted without taking the opinions of everyone else
into consideration. An apathy that was desirable, considering what my life consisted
of… It was short lived but I felt the most me, the most free. Yet, I know I may never
experience that again unless I lose control, even then, I doubt the outcome would be
the same. I wasn’t in reality, I was in some other world… my head, the clouds, or
wherever else you could be that just wasn’t here… I wish it never ended, or that I
could've known my future, or that I never allowed myself to stray so far from what
was normal. Now I long for that feeling, it seems that I always will. It's a miserable
way to live, to always want for what you cannot have. When I stare out the window
during a car ride, or while daydreaming at school, or just when looking up to the sky,
I'm almost there again. But it will never be the same.
you are visitor: